The Sonnets of Odes In Which Is Life
Nailah Howell-Peters
ACT no.I They are trying their best (but you hate them)
A young child, supposed to be filled with glee
it hurts to smile for those close or just a stranger
But I can be happy for them, why wouldn’t I be?
I do not like how my mind meanders
Thoughts sit in my mind
Echoing in my ear
And they will stay for some time
Gradually, it feels as though my demise is near
My family is here and I am comforted I think
While the hollering travel about
They slip through the nooks of my doorknob
And scream, scream, shout
Is it something about me that the yelling remains?
I wish to know the answer to this disdain
With the conscience of your guilt I stay clueless
With how, as I suffer, you don't seem to see
Everything remains the same, how life feels far
Look back, you see me
Adolescence
ACT no.II W̶h̶y̶ ̶a̶m̶ ̶I̶ ̶l̶i̶k̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶i̶s̶
‘It is you’ my thoughts will sneer
How could that be when I haven’t done wrong?
Observing around me, I am living in fear
The thoughts lure me in like a siren’s song
I am hateful to my mother, to my father, to my brother
When they look at me, what is my face telling them?
Everything inside seems to boil and cluster
Just stay the way you are, as the perfect little gem
Was I really as beatific as I appeared so?
My mind was hellcat, alone, numb
No sense of the mess that was I; Looking at the world as a hologram and pseudo
What was I to do for it all to be done
What will happen then
What will become of them
Another day, another awakening
I feel tired but I would like to smile again
What is this that I am living as I cry
I want to be gone
Soon to Be Teen
ACT no.III You're not okay (and that's okay)
Worrisome, noticing
No one is allowed to see
And I feel myself slowly parting
And suddenly,.. things are less cloudy
I am still with fear, but I feel free
Things are still not the best
But it takes time for them to be
You do not always have to be filled with zest
And still the thoughts will pass by
And I don’t like them, but they are there
I let out the breath I never knew I was holding, with a sigh
Emotions are now out and bare
How will I live on from here
Will I play out mere
I felt my life was an unused piano
Collecting dust with no melody to hear
I felt I existed only as a shadow
I can start to feel
Into the World
ACT no.IV How is it?
All around me is the open air
My surroundings are becoming clearer
The idea of hope shines like a flare
Existence is keener
You Will Bloom; ode to my life, to your life
ACT no.V Is This Life
Life will not stay bad forever you will see
To thee, a forever lasting solution
You will soon know the wonders of life that is,
You will bloom, you know
Soon you will grow, and you will live life freely
You will live so many experiences
You will see what you never thought could be real
You are almost there
Bloom into what you never thought you could be
The world awaits the grace within your presence
Do what you want, enjoy what you’ve noticed not
Live, you will feel free
Hear the enchanting harps
And feel the waves on your fingertips
And you will live on
